Tuesday, August 26, 2008


So I started watching this the other day at work. I don't quite recall how I came upon it. In any event, I found it to be incredibly compelling. I couldn't stop watching it! Until I imagined somebody walking into my cube and catching me staring adoringly at it. Once I imagined myself trying to explain to my boss why I had Ronald JapDonald freaking the fuck out on my screen, turning it off was the only logical course of action. Enjoy!!

EDIT: As soon as I put this up on the site I started watching the video again and got sucked back in! I just can't shake the feeling that this is getting me ready for something. Like I need to watch it so I can be reprogrammed so I'll be ready for when we have to fight the first wave of AI robots or something. Or maybe they're peparing me for a life of servitude. MOTHy and I can hang out in our future-track suits and watch bizarre Japanese McDonald's remixes all day on the Holo-Vid until it's our turn to be harvested for parts to build ZombiOts: The first Robot-Zombie hybrid. And one day, the Good Lord willing, we'll be able to infect the flesh with lycanthropy AND zombie-ism to make the most powerful being of all time!

The Werombiot. BOOGILY!
Or else it's just some weird shit from a weird culture.
Or is it?

Friday, August 15, 2008

I Knew Right Away He Was Classy

I walked into the bathroom near my office today and I knew immediately that there was a classy guy in the shitter.

1. Despite me making sure I was noisy enough to alert him to my presence he was blasting out the sloppiest, underwear-striping, juice farts you could possibly imagine.
2. He was on the phone.
3. He sort of took his time getting off the phone.
4. He then got even sloppier with the pooper cheeze whiz.
5. He has a mullet.

Friday, August 8, 2008

Toy Hiatus

So check out this sexy bitch right mhya. That's right, it's the Lego Death Star and it's glorious. As soon as I saw it I knew it would be mine. It was like I was 10 all over again and dreaming about the expensive stuff in the mini-catalog that comes with smaller toys. So I told my wife, Nellbot, that, oh yes, it will be mine. So serious was I about making sure I got this Lego juggernaut, or Legonaut, if you will, that I swore off all other toys until I have this at Christmas time.

The idea is that, by staying my toy habit for a few months I would easily be able to justify spending the money I would have spent on several smaller toys on this one sex machine. I see now that I have fucked myself by saying I would wait until Christmas, though, because I know I would have spent more than $400 on toys between now and then. It's almost certain. So we're actually saving money by doing this.

While it's still totally worth the hiatus, I have not curtailed or altered my toy shopping habits, it's just that I don't buy anything. So whenever I'm in Target or Wal-Mart I still go immediately to the toy section it's just that I know ahead of time I'm going to have a massive case of blue balls when I leave. Some days it's not an issue because they have the same old shit but there have been a few serious temptations over the last 8 weeks that have tested my faith.

First I saw these sweet little fellows from Funko (please excuse my ghetto SnagIt/PowerPoint photo skillz). I already have a bunch of their Star Wars bobble heads so you can imagine my excitement when I saw these. But I knew right away it could not be. For the Lego Death Star holds a place in my heart that no bobble heads, no matter how gloriously Avengers, could fill. It was tough leaving these beauties behind but I held my head up high and looked valiantly to the future and my Lego Death Star and the end of my toy moritorium much the same way that Edmond Dantes looked forward to escaping from Chateu d'If and finding his beloved Mercedes.

Another line of toys I have which I enjoy very much are Hasbro's Muggs. I currently have several of the Star Wars ones and so I was once again pleased and heartbroken to see other classics in the line up which I really, really wanted to pick up. Behold! INDANA JONES MUGGS!!!

But, as you might have guessed by now I did not pick these up either. This is going to be an ongoing saga for me and therefore you, as well, until I get my baby. Subsequent related posts will almost certainly just be photos of other awesome toys I didn't buy.

I knew it was going to be hard...but I did not know it was going to be this hard...

Friday, August 1, 2008


As promised, I give you...Robot Loves Zombie Curiosities!!!
And I assure you, there will be more to come....