Any good conspiracy theorist will tell you that the news never, ever, ever tells us the truth. They are constantly looking for new ways to manipulate our minds to keep us scared and consuming things we don't need in order to keep the Thiefocratic Capitalist Industrial Killing Machine rolling at full steam. But the very best conspiracy theorist marks some of the lowest forms of humanity since they base all of their "theories" on random bullshit, circular logic, and weak, unsupported arguments. We here at Robot Loves Zombie do not condone such behavior nor do we allow such things to go unnoticed or unchecked. MOTHbot and I are an Atheist and a logical Agnostic, respectively, and both can be accurately described as reasonable Skeptics.
Having said all of that, check out this shit and this other shit I found on CNN.com yesterday! It's only a matter of some short years before
A. We get Ironman-type armored combat suits made available to the general populace. Of course they'll be marketed simply as a means of personal transportation but there will immediately be an underground market catering to people who would like their transportation to also support our 2nd Amendment Right to fuck shit up at or near the speed of sound.
B. We finally update our robots to be more human-like than ever and we have a force that can finally face the zombie hordes without fear or reservation. Only an unwavering efficiency in the face of insurmountable odds. They'll be the New Vanguard of human civilization.
C. Option B happens but MOTHbot and I have our brains downloaded into the only two Deluxe models of the robots above ever made, control the New Vanguard saving what's left of humanity and then promptly subjugating it and finally realizing The Church of the Nation State of Chaka Khanistan, Incorporated, LLC. in all it's glory!!!
So if you're out there reading this I highly recommend that you learn the CNSCKIL national anthem, "Stockholme Syndrome" by Muse and work on your zombie skull bashing skillz because Dekx and MOTHy ain't got no time for pussies or despots. IT'S ROBOT TIME, BABY!!! BRING ON THE FUCKIN' ZOMBIES!!!!
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Robot Loves Zombie is pretty much what you get when you combine two things that are already awesome and they form something more awesome than the sum of the awesome of the two awesome things as measured separately. In that regard, it is NOT unlike combining naked chicks and mullets.
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3 comments:
Yesssss. Yesss Smithers, my evil technology is finally catching up with my evil planssss.
That is soooo hot!
That's awesome. Controlling your movements, even at the most minute levels like eye movement because you might accidentally download gay robot porn or erase your favorite Bacon Melon Baller song - genius. Plus the gub'ment will have our boys hardwired so they can "read their binoculars"...yes. It's gonna be the future soooooooon!
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